Walking with Him
Life is hard.
I spend time chasing a dream only to have it slip through my fingers. God says to trust him but it can be so hard sometimes. Why should I when it only brings heartache? His Word tells me the reward for my pain and agony awaits in heaven. But does it? Really? Or is that a dream as well? I'm tired, and I have only one thing to say, this life is hard.
"Rejoice and be glad, for your reward in heaven is great; for the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you."
28 years ago
My heart was full...joyful. Nothing could bring me down from the mountaintop. Jesus was my Savior and the Holy Spirit had filled every corner of my soul, my life. I wanted, no, needed to shout it from the highest peaks I could find! In fact, I did on several occasions, much to the chagrin of those around me. Many told me that my newfound joy would fade. I kept hearing those dreaded words we all hear anytime we do something people don't like, "it's just a phase." I didn't believe them. What I had experienced that night at Single's Group changed my life forever. I was a Child of God. He wasn't just a story someone made up in a book. He was real!
15 years ago
How many times would my prayers go unanswered? How many times would I say the words only for them to fall on deaf ears? Would I need to watch my husband go under the knife, suffer through one surgery after the other only to have to endure another? Would he have to live a life of torture and me...would I be condemned to one of hopelessness...not being able to do anything about it but cry? I'm told to lie to him and pretend I'm happy by people I trust. To grieve in private for the happier days of old. To love him and be strong, after all, that's the makings of a "good wife." So, what should I do? Be "strong" and lie to the love of my life? Or reveal the truth...my weakness...my debilitating fear to the man who needs my strength the most? Oh, why has God abandoned us in our darkest hour?
7 years ago
It's leap of faith time...again. How many times does that make it for us? Three? I'm sure there's more but anyway. We seem to do this when no one, or should I say, everyone least expects it. Trust me, we don't do it deliberately to shock the world. The Lord tells us to go and we just...well, go. The first time was when our son was 6 months old and we packed up everything we owned (not much, believe me) and set off across Wyoming and Montana looking for work. God provided. The second time was when James quit and moved us to Laramie when I said I wanted to be a pharmacist. Sean, our son, was 10 months old. Again, God provided. This time, we moved to Texas on faith that God would provide the healthcare and surgeries James could not receive in Wyoming. Would that happen? We didn't know. That's why it's called a leap of faith! But we sold our house in Lander and moved to Mt. Pleasant, Texas. Our huge leap of faith.
What do I know now? Through it all, no matter what may come, what my happen...God is good...all the time. He never fails. His Word never fails. When you are lost and searching for answers, He is faithful. You can go to Him.
28 years ago, I sang from the mountaintops no matter what people thought or said. God is good.
15 years ago, I told the truth to my husband and we faced both of our fears together with the Lord. God is good...all the time.
7 years go, I took another leap of faith with my husband at my side and God showed me that He is faithful...a part of my daily walk with Jesus. All the time...God is good.
I may have good times, I may have bad. Endure horrible pain and sadness, but I am not alone.
I've learned a lot since that first week of being a Christian. (Good word, eh?) Life is easy, fun, joyful, trying, and hard. It can be great and it can bad. But it's worth it if you have Jesus Christ, the Savior, walking with you along the way.
So, what about you? Are you getting daily smack downs from the Lord? If not, you should. Don't try to traverse the world's highways by yourself, not with all of their potholes and pitfalls. Not when you don't have to.
"The Rock! His work is perfect, For all His ways are just; A God of faithfulness and without injustice, Righteous and upright is He."